In a world full of people, who share similarities with you, it may feel even harder to make yourself stand out. With the endless ways of sharing our entire lives with each other, and having access to any piece of information you may need at any point in time, there seems to be no end to competing with everyone else. Not to mention continually beating yourself up for not being anyone but yourself.
For years I have never been assured of my place, always being the one on the outside of the circle. Though I appeared to be ‘apart’ of a group I was never really accepted for who I was or felt pressure to think and behave in a way that fitted in with my peers or society. There was no lonelier place to be than to be in a group, and to feel so unwanted. To this day it is hard to shift out of that mindset that it wasn’t who I was that was the real issue, but that doesn’t dismiss how much it still haunts me that I will never really ‘fit in’.
What do I mean by fitting in?
I am referring to the stereotypical ideas of what it is like a certain age, gender, ethnicity, to be doing X as a career, to be living in X etc. Being in a country that is ‘full of opportunities’ for all, with a strong rise of equality and diversity, there should be no boundaries or obstacles that are any different for anyone of us.
As I have become more passionate about making something positive happen through ‘The Growing Butterfly’ the more I have come to realise that I really down fit in with the norms that the blogger/social media industry has. As a matter of fact, it is the social norms of society as a whole.
I am 24 years old living with my family in Staffordshire, in my second year of university studying Psychology and Counselling. I have only begun the journey due to suffering for years with mental health issues, and as a result, started this blog. I have ambition, knowledge, and the experience to really connect with those who I hope to reach out to. It would seem that I have all that it takes to make it work.
Unfortunately, it isn’t that simple as having certain personal qualities and characteristics in order to make your dreams become reality.
We are still just as obsessed with the materialistic, aesthetical and demographical factors as we have always been. It is just more disguised on a day-to-day basis that it was only 20 years ago.
Society plays on emotions; desires needs and wants. It loves nothing more than to prey on the vulnerability of the mind, and capture attention through subjecting the reader or viewer to what they believe to be the ‘ideal’ way to look, act, behave and think and where they ought to live and what to do for a career. This tends the underpinning message that goes into social media where ever you look.
Even when it may appear to be a post promoting something that is positive, inspiring and encouraging you to be exactly who you are, wherever / whoever you are, there is still that unspoken divide in society that you need to fit certain criteria to reach the highest of heights.
It doesn’t half get me down when I know that some of the biggest hurdles so many of us who are trying to make it as a blogger or influencer that it could largely be down to demographical hostility. There is so much talent going unnoticed by the masses because it and I don’t like the idea that many of these amazing people are beating themselves up over why they can’t become more successful despite all their efforts to do so.
Am not dismissing that I don’t think about the appearance of my own posts, because let’s face it, there is no way that the majority of people who do follow and like my content would actually do so if I didn’t care at all about how it appears. But what I am aiming to do is to lead by example and not conform to this industry norms, to make a point that is shouldn’t matter what your body looks like, where you live, what you are doing or aspiring towards.
I am not out to put anyone down or criticise those who are doing so well for themselves, because they are just as entitled to achieving their dreams too. Though I am hoping that little by little more voices will be heard and appreciated.
It’s about time that we all actually started to practice what we preach.